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Tuesday, April 7, 2015

This Easter Season

The biggest word I feel like God has placed on my heart lately is the word wait.

I am still confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the Lord
in the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the Lord.
 
Psalm 27: 13-14
 
This is the ultimate anthem for our family. This Easter. And however long God chooses to let this season of waiting last.
 
I've done a lousy job of being patient and content - giving God the space to work through the circumstances and challenges in my life in His timing, not mine. I haven't been gracious. I haven't been kind in my heart. I've lost focus. I've lost hope.
 
I realize my circumstances may never change. Within the last three years, we've listed and sold our house in 12 hours. Found a bigger home that we loved, only to be told we had major foundation damage in our current home and couldn't move after all. Spent $11,000 on foundation repairs in one year. Spent $20,000 on more foundation repairs last year. Currently racking up more money on repairs and home improvements this year...on top of normal life with one income + three kids (one of whom travels out-of-state every month) + paying off debt + cracks that never seem to go away, and some days - it feels like we're drowning.
 
All the while, I keep hoping. I keep praying that our miracle home is going to come, whatever that may be. And then I read this yesterday:
 
"BUT GOD. Ever so gently He reminded me that I can't always see the big picture. He has a plan that is better than ours. He must have a better house for us. But you know what, we aren't promised that. He may not have a better house for us. We may have walked through this season for another reason. We don't know. But, He knows and His plans are always right and good. So yes, I will be disappointed if we don't move (soon or not at all), but I trust Him and on Him do I wait...not on the perfect house, not on my circumstances to change, but I will wait on Him. He will answer in His time and in His way."
 
Thank you to my new sweet mentor friend Candace Crabtree for her kind words that spoke to my heart at just the right time.
 
We are in a long season of waiting. Waiting with hands lifted high in the air, hearts surrendered to Him. Waiting for Him to move mountains right where we are - whatever that may entail. Waiting and hoping in Him, knowing He will answer whenever He sees fit. And, whatever it is, it's the absolute best...for us!

Thank you, Jesus. Waiting patiently here for you...
 



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