Yesterday we went on a 400-mile drive and picked up Jacob at our regular meeting place in Kentucky. We packed lunches and snacks that we needed for the day in hopes that we would make it home fairly quickly.
Boy, were we wrong.
We hit stand-still construction traffic on 65 south. We're in the left lane and we aren't moving anywhere, except maybe a few inches at a time. Scot looks at his GPS and sees this goes on for four more miles. But, there isn't anywhere to turn around or get off. We are stuck.
At this point, Brooklyn says, "Mommy, I have to go potty!"
Thankfully, we have a little potty in the back of the van for emergency situations like these. Jacob crawls to the back of the van and pulls out the little potty. I put the potty in one of the second row seats and get Brooklyn all ready to do her thing.
In the meantime, I look around and notice how crazy we must look to the cars and trucks next to us. I am doubled over with my butt literally plastered to the window while my 3-year old daughter is half-naked on a potty for all to see. We put on quite the show.
Brooklyn gets a good look at the way I'm standing and says, "Mommy, your bottom is really BIG!" Why, thank you, sweetie.
Brooklyn finishes her business on the potty, but the smell is not something we were prepared for. Scot and Jake both hold their noses and start making gagging noises. I clean her up and put her back in the carseat. Closed the lid to the potty and set it on the floor. I somehow find a way to climb over all our stuff and get back in the front seat, prepared to sit some more.
Five minutes later, Brooklyn says the urgent words, "I have to go more poo-poo on the potty!" C'mon, really?
So...we go through the same motions a second time around. And give our onlookers another peep show. I couldn't help but laugh.
While Brooklyn sits there, Scot notices a place to turn around and proceeds to make a u-turn. There are several cars following us, so we don't have time to wipe Brooklyn, get her dressed and get her back in her seat. She stays put on the potty and I hold the back of the passenger seat with all my might. Scot starts getting nauseous from the horrible smell. I am dying laughing. And trying to keep Brooklyn and myself from face-planting into the floor of the van.
Scot pulls out into the interstate and gets off at a gas station at the first exit he sees. We get Brooklyn cleaned up and Scot heads to the bathroom to empty the foul smelling contents in the potty cup. I stand up and stretch my hunched back and belly. We all take in the fresh air.
Scot gets directions to bypass all the traffic by using the back roads in Kentucky. I turn on the DVD player. And we set off again. Ready for our next adventure.
To find a quick place to eat dinner before heading home. The second time around.
And we'll chalk that up to another crazy adventure on the road that we won't soon forget!